Pre-death realization.

"When I speak up, you shove your voice down my throat, and I choke. I stand to be kicked in the back of the knees. Who needs confidence when you know when it falls on deaf ears. What good is yourself when you are of no use to anyone? What is the point of tired efforts of trying, when no one wants you to love yourself. Why should I love myself when I know I'm incompatible? The spirit is a mere fabrication, only made to be broken. Hope is mere fiction, only to be disproved. Esteem is a mere outlet, for everyone else. Running low, running so low. When everyone is nothing but a mere figure, a stand in the background of everything, life loses it's importance. I don't care about myself, or anyone else."